Poetry/Story

I AM KUMARI BUT NOT A LIVING GODDESS

I AM KUMARI BUT NOT A LIVING GODDESS
I am waiting for the bright days to come
In my life bringing all kinds of delight
Waiting in the cavern for a peek of light.
Hoping to get out one day from it
Hoping to spread my limbs outside of it
Without any obstacle or obstruction.
You believe I don’t have any obstacles
You think I don’t have any obstructions
As I am a Goddess to fulfill all your
Dreams and desires.
So you ask what my problem is.

My day begins as a clown of the Circus
Everyone comes to see me worship me
And pay homage to me
The living Goddess “Kumari.”
Yes, I am Kumari or Virgin.
But how to explain
I am not really a Living Goddess.
That you worship for divine consciousness
I know you consider me the supreme
Goddess Of this cosmos.
You believe I have “thirty-two perfections”
But I am just a child, a small baby
I don’t know how many perfections I have.
The one thing I do have
Is the desire to be a child
But you don’t allow me,
Because for you I am a living goddess
I am not supposed to act as an earthly baby.
Do you think my body is really like a banyan tree?
And my eyes are like those of a holy cow?
That I look like a deer or resemble a lion?
Even my voice is not as clear as the duck
that you think you hear.
How can you worship me as a living Goddess?

You know if you allow it
I would love to escape
And break through the barriers
that stop me from flying.
You know it is a cage with invisible walls
It is a cup of sweet poison well colored
To lure every creature of the world.
It is a swampy land built in an altar.
Once you plunge me in it there is no retreat
It is not possible to escape
when you release me

Because you will find
a new goddess to replace me.
You know I have been sinking
All the time sinking without any hope.
This is not the life I was hoping to attain
But I accept it without objection.
Because I wait for the bright days to come
Into my life bringing all kinds of delight
To fill my day with vivid light
I wait for the bright light to come
So that I can live a life, a child’s delight.

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Categories: Poetry/Story

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